6th April 2014………..beginning of new adventure
Istanbul Airport, Sunday 6th April 2014 18.45pm
So, here I am in Istanbul. Stopping off on route to Kathmandu. Jesus, it’s all happening so fast after all the waiting! This morning was very surreal. The whole thing is still very surreal. Never really got too excited about this. Only booked this flight on Thursday I suppose but haven’t really thought about or planned it much. Mammy & Eva brought me to airport. Kept the going away thing very low key this time. Much prefer that after my failure the last time!! Felt very weird this morning. Like it wasn’t really registering with me that I was actually going. Strange. Not sure what to expect and don’t expect a lot after the last time (had to return home after 4 weeks due to back trouble!!).
Flight from Dublin to Istanbul flew by. Thoughts going through my head on flight and in the last few days ……………. Am I crazy to be doing this?? Should I not just settle down at home and put my savings towards a house? Settle into a job and do what everyone else my age is doing…….getting engaged/married, buying houses, having kids, saving money. Sometimes I think I would be better off doing that. The more time I spend at home, the more I feel it. Getting sucked in! Then I tell myself that can wait. Go travel. Spend the money! Don’t be wasteful, yet don’t become stingy either! You need a balance, otherwise the fun goes out of it. I want to do this while I can & not look back wishing I’d gone sooner. I realise I’m going against the grain but I feel it is a chance worth taking.
In the airport in Istanbul and suddenly I feel very alone. All on my own. It is a scary feeling and makes me feel like a very small fish in a very big pond! Away from the comfort zone of home. Fending for myself and I have to admit I do feel a bit afraid right now. Big change going from comforts of home & that safe environment to being out in the wild!! No routine & flying solo. Amazing how your daily life and routine can change just like that. Stepping outside the comfort zone. Well out of it!! Some people never leave the comfort zone, through fear. And others are very happy & satisfied in their lives and that is great for them. For me, I need more right now. I want to challenge myself and see what this world has to offer & what it can bring out in me.
One thing that I’m reminded of here in the airport is the amount of outstandingly beautiful women there are in this world!!! Outrageous beauty! People from different places and backgrounds. It is great to see and & just reminds me how small a bubble we actually live in back home. To see such difference and uniqueness is refreshing. Different nationalities, languages, clothes, accents, hairstyles, colours, shapes, styles! It is a great thing to witness and a wonderful thing to experience. To be in the middle of it and part of it at the same time!! Incredible!!